All Fun and Games, Until…
Parenting is hard sometimes, no doubt about it. But then there are those times where we’re the ones making it way harder than it should be. Here’s a story I probably shouldn’t be sharing…but here we go.
It all started out simple enough. We were strolling around the mall, window shopping, enjoying the smells of pretzels and churros, when the inevitable happened. My son, who was around 8 and looked like he was on a mission to break a world record for holding it in, suddenly announced, “I have to go to the washroom. Now.”
Naturally, as the designated parent on duty, I took him there. Now, here’s the thing about parenting: sometimes, you’ve got to keep things entertaining – even in front of a public restroom. So, as he went in, I thought, “Why not spice things up a little?” I decided to play a little game of hide-and-seek. I ducked behind a potted plant, thinking he’d come out, see me gone, and be thrilled to look for me. Turns out…he wasn’t exactly thrilled. In fact, he wasn’t even playing along.
After about ten minutes, I still hadn’t seen him come out. The kid was thorough. Now I was starting to wonder, “What if he, you know, went out a different door? Did he wander off somewhere?” That’s when my brain goes into full-on "Dad Detective Mode." I start scanning every stall door, practically interrogating anyone who walked by.
Then, about another 10–15 minutes pass, and my phone buzzes. It’s his mom. Oh no.
Mom: “Are you and our son okay?”
Me: (fake calm voice) “Yeah, of course, we’re just… we’ll be there soon!”
Mom: “Are you sure? You guys have been a while.”
Me: “We’re all good! No stress!” (while I am so stressing, sweating like I just ran a marathon)
Mom: “Alright, FYI, your son is with me. Just thought I’d let you know.” She hangs up the phone.
Now, I’m just standing there in front of a potted plant, abandoned in the middle of the mall, looking like the most confused man on earth, realizing I’d been hiding from absolutely no one.
One of the morals of this story … Sometimes, in my grand quest to make everything fun and exciting, I end up turning the simplest tasks into full-blown adventures. In this case, I put myself through a whole lot of unnecessary stress trying to make a trip to the washroom “memorable,” when all my son really needed was for me to just stand by the door like a normal parent. In other words, maybe it’s best to keep it simple, especially when it comes to bathroom breaks!
But hey, it’s a funny reminder that sometimes just being there is enough—no need for dad theatrics every time. And for the record, I still play around with the kids… but I’ve never lost another one since!
Your feedback: I recently shared a story about losing my son in the mall when he was very young. It wasn’t funny at the time, but thankfully, we can laugh about it now. The feedback I received was fascinating—I heard several stories from other parents about losing their child or a child being lost. While most of these stories were shared in a lighthearted way, there was a common thread that stood out: the lifetime trauma tied to the experience.
For many parents and children, the fear and helplessness in those moments leave a lasting impression. It’s a level of anxiety that often stays with you, influencing future decisions and habits. Some parents mentioned how these experiences drove them to adopt tools like the 360 app, underscoring the deep desire to ensure such a terrifying moment never happens again. It's a reminder of how even brief incidents can leave an emotional mark that shapes our actions and perspectives long after the event.
To work toward better internal resolve over this and other fears, there are practical steps and tools that can help:
Mindful Reflection: Journaling your thoughts and feelings about the incident can help process and release pent-up anxiety. Reflect on the experience, what you learned, and how it has shaped your approach to safety.
Grounding Techniques: Practice mindfulness or grounding exercises to ease moments of panic or fear when thinking about similar situations. Techniques like deep breathing or the 5-4-3-2-1 method (naming things you can see, hear, touch, smell, and taste) can help re-center your mind.
Positive Visualization: Imagine positive outcomes and scenarios where you’re prepared and in control. Visualization can help reduce fear by retraining your mind to focus on solutions instead of worst-case scenarios.
Education and Safety Plans: Equip yourself and your children with safety protocols. Practice “what to do if we get separated” scenarios in a calm, fun way to build confidence and preparedness.
Self-Compassion: Remind yourself that moments of fear or mistakes are part of parenting. Acknowledge your efforts and focus on the strength you’ve shown since the incident.
Trauma often lingers because it feels unresolved, but by actively engaging with these emotions and empowering yourself with tools, you can transform fear into confidence and clarity moving forward.
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Personal reflection:
